incomprehensible things, Pt. 2

I AM an Indonesian Idle. Mungkin itu sebabnya, ada beberapa hal yang gw ga bisa ngerti tentang American Idol.

Juri keempat American Idol.
Setelah ratingnya anjlog di season terakhir, Nigel Lythgoe pun dipecat. Dan ada satu lagi perubahan, American Idol kedatangan satu lagi juri baru: Kara DioGuardi.
Kara sudah malang-melintang dalam dunia rekaman, dan yang pasti enak dilihat. Dengan hadirnya Kara, bakal ada empat juri di American Idol, seperti halnya pada X-Factor dan [aduh…] Indonesian Idol dulu. And if you’re asking what will happen if the judges are split 2 to 2, Simon Cowell will be the decision maker! Which is good, because I think he’s the only judge with some active brain cells left.

The Nipples.
Di season lalu, Jimmy Kimmel menghajar habis Simon Cowell dengan introduksinya yang 80% berisi punchline. It was so hilarious, that I downloaded and watched it over and over. Simply one of my favorite Idol moments. My favorite quotes were:
‘Actually a lot of people were asked to introduce him, but no one else would do it’
‘I know you’ve had that black V-neck since the 4th grade, but it’s time to let it go’
‘Who parts that hair for you? Moses?’
‘He supports PETA, against cruelty to animals. Simon feels strongly that cruelty should be reserved for the contestants on the show’
And of course:
‘His nipples are the size of pepper mills, on many nights it looks like he’s smuggling the Olsen twins under your shirt’.

Jimmy was not joking, he was just telling the truth.And Ryan was just lucky that Jimmy did not know his nipples are as big as Simon’s.

Dulu Personal Assistant saya mengajarkan permainan favoritnya dengan seorang finalis L-Men of the Year 2008: Tebak Puting a.k.a Spot the Nipples. Well, in this case, you would not find any difficulty spotting them.

Clay Aiken punya anak.
Setelah Ricky Martin punya anak kembar dengan pinjem rahim seseorang who supposedly was his cousin, Clay Aiken ga mau kalah. Dia baru punya bayi. Dengan inseminasi buatan tentunya. The next thing, he was paid 500 grand for People’s cover and coming out. Dunia ini semakin membingungkan.

Ryan Seacrest.
The smile. The hair that not even a hurricane can blow away. The lack of improvisation. The unfunny jokes. BORING.

Kristy Lee Cook.
David Cook made selling records on ITunes. David Archuleta’s single got many positive reviews. And Kristy Lee Cook is the first Season 7 finalist to release an album? D’oh.